RETREEEAAAT! or maybe not
Oh how I dream of screaming out my car (not van) window REETREEEAAATTT! as I drive down the highway but, I am having serious doubts about actually doing it.
I have never been away from my 5 kids for more than a few hours. Even when I went to the hospital to have the last two babies I was back home with my family withiin 24 hours. I hate hospitals and with rooming in caring for a bay in the hospital while my husband is home with the other kids is no picnic.
A few years ago when I was pregnant with the boy who is now a toddler, I went away overnight for work. I flew to Toronto, big pregnant on a plane, fun. Worked all day, all evening, went to dinner (work) and then crashed in the hotel before working again the next day and flying home. Not exactly me time.
So when my sister in law wrote me a nice letter inviting me to a retreat weekend it appealed to me. I was pretty excited about the idea of having some time for myself. I have been imagining it ever since I sent in the registration. Time for meditation. No cooking, dishes or laundry. Going for a walk by myself. Reading.
But now, as the actual days draw closer, I am having second thoughts. I am supposed to leave on Thursday night so I asked my mom to come watch the two littles on Friday while my husband is at work. My mom does not usually watch my kids. She has taken the 15 yo, the 8yo and the 6yo overnight at her place a couple of times but, she has never watched my two babies.
And now, my toddler is sick, feverish and coughing.
And this retreat costs $$ and we have to pay $$ for our teen to go on a student exchange and where's the money going to come from. This retreat is not a nescessary exspense and I am just not sure we should spend the money now.
And what if I go away and end up feeling so guilty about going, that I come back feeling angry because I feel guilty. I am only thinking this because this has happened before.
I know, I know I should take care of me and it will make me more able to care for my family. I've read the articles, the books but, it is just not so easy.
I have never been away from my 5 kids for more than a few hours. Even when I went to the hospital to have the last two babies I was back home with my family withiin 24 hours. I hate hospitals and with rooming in caring for a bay in the hospital while my husband is home with the other kids is no picnic.
A few years ago when I was pregnant with the boy who is now a toddler, I went away overnight for work. I flew to Toronto, big pregnant on a plane, fun. Worked all day, all evening, went to dinner (work) and then crashed in the hotel before working again the next day and flying home. Not exactly me time.
So when my sister in law wrote me a nice letter inviting me to a retreat weekend it appealed to me. I was pretty excited about the idea of having some time for myself. I have been imagining it ever since I sent in the registration. Time for meditation. No cooking, dishes or laundry. Going for a walk by myself. Reading.
But now, as the actual days draw closer, I am having second thoughts. I am supposed to leave on Thursday night so I asked my mom to come watch the two littles on Friday while my husband is at work. My mom does not usually watch my kids. She has taken the 15 yo, the 8yo and the 6yo overnight at her place a couple of times but, she has never watched my two babies.
And now, my toddler is sick, feverish and coughing.
And this retreat costs $$ and we have to pay $$ for our teen to go on a student exchange and where's the money going to come from. This retreat is not a nescessary exspense and I am just not sure we should spend the money now.
And what if I go away and end up feeling so guilty about going, that I come back feeling angry because I feel guilty. I am only thinking this because this has happened before.
I know, I know I should take care of me and it will make me more able to care for my family. I've read the articles, the books but, it is just not so easy.
posted by T at
10:17 AM
7 Comments:
I hear ya... and totally know what your saying! Sometimes a "retreat" is not very "retreating". Can you send the hubby and kids away and you stay home with the sick baby???? Clean your house and sit in it for a whole hour alone.... Now THAT would be a retreat. Why do we always do it backwards?
I'm sure you'd have fun if you go though!
By
Tina, at 3:50 PM
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
By
Tina, at 5:27 PM
This is a hard one. I had to spend a week away from my girls, and was a wreck by day 4. But, I think a couple of days away can do a mom a lot of good, a recharging time. But, you have to be confortable with the childcare and sick baby situation, otherwise you won't have any fun at all. Good luck in making a decision.
By
deedee, at 1:19 AM
GO GO GO !!!
Life is too short young lady !!
Have fun. Your mom can take care of the sick ones. You'll appreciate everyone and everyone will appreciate you better if you get a break.
By
JeepGirl, at 8:55 AM
Well Hello!
You live not far from me. LOL! And thanks for stopping by my blog and answering my SQOB. Although alot of times my Questions are NOT Stupid.
Go on the retreat. Yes it is hard the first time. But all will be ok. don't let Mothering guilt stop you. I go once a year with my girlfriends and and it is sooo worth it.
Hugs and I hope everyone is better soon.
By
Silver Creek Mom, at 9:45 AM
it's necessary. re-read your post and HEAR how necessary it really us! have fun.
By
Anonymous, at 2:26 PM
If your toddler is doing better by this weekend I would definitely try to go. But I can understand about not wanting to leave a sick child. Sounds like you deserve some me time! Don't feel guilty! It sounds like your sister in law wanted you to have some time to yourself, too.
By
Anonymous, at 8:51 PM
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